Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize
