It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
