i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
