Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
