The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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