the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
No subtext here. People are naked.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
