Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
