i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
