Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
