I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
