i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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