Well apparently he's into motor boating.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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