My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
