my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize