I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
