I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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