Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
