pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
