she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
