A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
