I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
