hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
