i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
He had one of those small greek statue penises
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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