i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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