How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
