fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
