I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
