ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
