ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
