Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
