it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
