I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
