Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
organizing the empties. That sober.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize