What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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