dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
