nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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