Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize