You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize