the day after is always just damage control
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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