Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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