I need help removing her.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
She needs sedatives and a leash
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize