shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize