Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
