So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
