I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
