i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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