I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
