is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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