So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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