I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
