You're completely useless in the revolution.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
